Friday, October 28, 2022

Can Marriage Bring Happiness and Satisfaction with Life?

             Individuals can strengthen their family as well as their community and nation by getting married – preferably before the birth of any children. When I speak of marriage, I mean a union between one man and one woman. In 1995 the First Presidency and the Quorum of Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints published a document titled “The Family: A Proclamation to the World.” The first paragraph of the document defined “marriage [as being] between a man and a woman” and declared such a marriage to be “ordained of God.”

            According to Jim Daly, such a marriage brings myriad benefits to the spouses, to their children, and to society. (See his book titled “Marriage Done Right: One Man, One Woman.”) In an article published by The Daily Signal, Timothy Goeglein quoted the statement from Daly, who is the president of Focus on the Family. 

            Quoting a recent essay by W. Bradford Wilcox, Goeglein said that one of the key benefits from marriage is happiness. He also noted, “It’s perhaps no coincidence that some of the most dissatisfied voices in our toxic public discourse come from those who are not married.” 

Wilcox wrote that in 1970, there were 77 marriages per 100 women. Forty-five years later, that number had decreased to 32 marriages per hundred, and it has continued to decrease to the point where, according to the 2022 American Family Survey, the share of American men and women who are currently married is only 45%.


The decreasing marriage rate has led to a spike in the number of people living alone – more than 37 million adults as of 2021. While not all adults living alone are lonely, many are, and those individuals are more likely to lack significant social connections, which can be deadly…..


But the problem goes beyond just the individual. It affects our society as well. Many of our current cultural divides can be traced to social isolation and the lack of connections individuals have with a wide swath of people. Thus, loneliness, and the bitterness it ferments, has not occurred in a vacuum.


Nevertheless, despite evidence that documents how marriage provides many of the social connections needed to not just survive, but to thrive in life, our culture continues to send messages that women do not need a husband to be happy; that men should focus on their careers instead of family; and “the kids will be all right” even when they lack a mother or a father.

            Goeglein again looked at Wilcox’s essay in which Wilcox looks at research from the American Community Survey on the happiness of married vs. single women – and declared the contrast to be “stark.” “Married mothers between the ages of 18 and 55 have mean household income of $133,000, compared with $79,000 for those in the same age range that re single and childless.” However, finances do not paint the whole picture of contentment and happiness.

In the American Family Survey, 33% of those same married mothers reported they were “completely satisfied” with their lives. In contrast, only 15% of single and childless women felt the same way.


In addition, about 60% of those single and childless women were more likely to report feelings of loneliness compared with married mothers. That suggests that the bonds created through family and friends are perhaps the most important factor in life satisfaction. Given the trend that married women tend to be deeply concerned about cultural issues that affect their families, and as a result often lean more conservative in their worldview, it logically follows that the happiest women are conservative women.


Conservatives also have ties to organizations, such as churches, that provide connections with others. The survey reports a 15-percentage point gap between conservative women saying they are completely satisfied with their lives, compared with liberal women (31% vs. 16%).

            Goeglein continued by saying that it was not just the women because another study demonstrated “the positive changes men experience once they become fathers, such as becoming less self-absorbed and more empathetic to others.” He then declared that “The key to a happy life is a connected life – and marriage and families are a common denominator in making those connections.”

            The surveys showed that married women and married men are happier and more satisfied with their lives than are their single counterparts. Happy couples lead to happy and strong families, and happy and strong families strengthen their communities and nations.

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