There are few challenges in this world that are more
difficult than staying morally clean; this is especially true for teens and
young adults. Sexual intimacy is a gift
from God, a gift that can bring fulfillment and pleasure if used properly. Heavenly Father expects us to use this gift
within the guidelines He gives us: this
intimacy should take place only within marriage. Satan tries to convince us that this gift can
be used freely whenever and with anyone we choose, but those who follow Satan's
temptations end up feeling regret, pain, and sorrow. Those who stand firm against Satan and keep
the Lord's standards of moral cleanliness find happiness and peace of mind.
Moral cleanliness - also known as chastity and
virtue - is a precious gift. President
Spencer W. Kimball described it as "being most dear and precious above all
things" (Conference Report, Sydney Australia Area Conference 1976, p. 54).
Chastity is the Lord's standard of moral (sexual)
cleanliness. Heavenly Father has
commanded that we abstain from any kind of sexual intimacy before marriage and
be completely faithful to our spouse after marriage. He has also commanded us to avoid immoral
forms of entertainment and to keep our thoughts clean and pure.
The scriptures contain many examples of people
who understood the importance of chastity.
One good example was Joseph, who was sold into slavery by his brothers
and became the servant of Potiphar, a prosperous Egyptian. (See Genesis 37; 39.)
"And
it came to pass after these things, that his master's wife cast her eyes upon
Joseph; and she said, Lie with me.
"But he refused, and said unto his master's wife,
Behold, my master wotteth [knoweth] not what is with me in the house, and he
hath committed all that he hath to my hand.
"There is none greater in this house than I;
neither hath he kept back any thing from me but thee, because thou art his
wife: how then can I do this great
wickedness, and sin against God?
"And it came to pass, as she spake to Joseph
day by day, that he hearkened not unto her, to lie by her, or to be with
her. (See Genesis 39:7-10.)
Joseph
knew the Lord's stand of chastity and recognized that Potiphar's wife was
trying to persuade him to violate that standard. The wife of Potiphar was very insistent in
her demands, and one day she almost succeeded in catching him.
"And it came to pass about this time, that
Joseph went into the house to do his business; and there was none of the men of
the house there within.
"And she caught him by his garment, saying
Lie with me: and he left his garment in
her hand, and fled, and got him out. (See
Genesis 39:11-12.)
When Potiphar's
wife lied about the incident and said Joseph had made improper advances to her,
Joseph was thrown into prison. (See Genesis
39:13-20.) Joseph must have known that
he was risking much when he said no.
After all, he was a foreigner in Egypt
Satan is very subtle, and he designs traps with
delicious "bait" to lure us into improper behavior. He does not immediately try to tempt us to
commit serious sins, but he starts by tempting us into seemingly innocent
thoughts and activities that can easily lead to more serious sins.
"And
there shall also be many which shall say:
Eat, drink, and be merry; nevertheless, fear God - he will justify in
committing a little sin; yea, lie a little, take the advantage of one because
of his words, dig a pit for thy neighbor; there is no harm in this; and do all
these things, for tomorrow we die; and if it so be that we are guilty, God will
beat us with a few stripes, and at last we shall be saved in the kingdom of
God. …
"For
behold, at that day shall he rage in the hearts of the children of men, and
stir them up to anger against that which is good.
"And
others will he pacify, and lull them away into carnal security, that they will
say: All is well in Zion; yea, Zion
prospereth, all is well -- and thus the devil cheateth their souls, and leadeth
them away carefully down to hell.
"And
behold, others he flattereth away, and telleth them there is no hell; and he
saith unto them: I am no devil, for
there is none -- and thus he whispereth in their ears, until he grasps them
with his awful chains, from whence there is no deliverance. (See
Book of Mormon - Another Testament of
Jesus Christ, 2 Nephi 28:8, 20-22.)
Some of Satan's bait comes through the media. This is why leaders of The Church of Jesus
Christ of Latter-day Saints has warned the rising generation with counsel such
as the following.
"Whatever you read, listen to, or watch
makes an impression on you. Public
entertainment and the media can provide you with much positive experience. They can uplift and inspire you, teach you
good and moral principles, and bring you closer to the beauty this world
offers. But they can also make what is
wrong and evil look normal, exciting, and acceptable" (For the Strength of Youth, p. 11)
Many popular movies, television programs, books,
magazines, and music reflect the world's standards, which are very different
from the Lord's standards. Not only do
worldly standards promote the use of alcohol, tobacco, and violence, they
incorrectly suggest that sexual intimacy should be available to anyone at any
time. Media that promote worldly
standards usually fail to show the physical and spiritual harm that comes from
breaking God's commandments.
President Gordon B. Hinckley stated: "There are storms blowing around
you. There is the clever exploitation of
sex and violence to be seen on television and through videotapes, [pornographic]
magazines, long distance telephone services, and even the Internet.
"My plea to you … is to distance yourselves
from these things. You can [change the
channel] on the TV set. You can shun
like a plague the renting or acquisition of videotapes designed to titillate
and lead you into regrettable paths….
You don't have to read sleazy literature of any kind. It will not help you. It will only injure you" ("True to
the Faith," Ensign, June 1996,
4).
Have you ever said or heard someone else say,
"This movie is OK because it only has one bad scene" or "I like
the music but I never listen to the words." I have.
The problem with these justifications for watching or listening to
immoral things is because even a small amount of evil can affect us negatively
by making us temporally unable to feel the promptings of the Holy Ghost. Accepting a small amount of evil will also
make us more susceptible to greater evil.
If we watch movies with "just one" bad scene, we will become
less concerned about movies with several bad scenes and will accept more
immorality and evil into our lives. When
we listen to music, even if we do not consciously notice the lyrics, our
subconscious mind may be listening to them and recording them in our memory.
In order to make sure that the movies, television
shows, music, books, magazines, and other media that influence us are
reflective of the Lord's standards and not the world's standards, we must have
a standard to judge them. We find such a
standard in the Book of Mormon where Moroni
"For
behold, the Spirit of Christ is given to every man, that he may know good from
evil; wherefore, I show unto you the way to judge; for every thing which
inviteth to do good, and to persuade to believe in Christ, is sent forth by the
power and gift of Christ; wherefore ye may know with a perfect knowledge it is
of God.
"But
whatsoever thing persuadeth men to do evil, and believe not in Christ, and deny
him, and serve not God, then ye may know with a perfect knowledge it is of the
devil; for after this manner doth the devil work, for he persuadeth no man to
do good, no, not one; neither do his angels; neither do they who subject
themselves unto him." (See Moroni
We learn from these verses how to evaluate what
is good and what is evil. Anything that
invites us to do good and to persuade us to believe in Christ is good. Anything that persuades us to do evil and to
not believe in Christ is evil.
Our thirteenth Article of Faith explains that
"We believe in being honest, true,
chaste, benevolent, virtuous, and in doing good to all men; indeed, we may say
that we follow the admonition of Paul -- We believe all things, we hope all
things, we have endured many things, and hope to be able to endure all
things. If there is anything virtuous,
lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things" (Pearl of Great Price, Article Faith
1:13).
We should do more than just avoid evil; in fact,
we are instructed to "forsake all evil" but at the same time to
"cleave unto all good." (See Doctrine and Covenants 98:11.) When the thirteenth Article of Faith says
that we should "seek after" good things, it means that we should make
an effort to find them, study them, and discover their beauty. We should shun media that do not meet the
Lord's standards, but we should also seek out media that support the Lord's
standards.
Satan also uses fashion to lure us into immorality; he
does this by encouraging us to wear immodest clothing. Our spiritual leaders have given this wise
counsel to guide us.
"Servants of God have always counseled his
children to dress modestly to show respect for him and for themselves. Because the way you dress sends messages
about yourself to others and often influences the way you and others act, you
should dress in such a way as to bring out the best in yourself and those
around you." (See For the Strength of Youth, p. 8.)
This counsel reflects a simple principle: how we dress affects the way we behave. Wise parents and leaders use this principle
to encourage good behavior.
The story is told of a coach of a professional
sports team who was very disturbed by the actions and language of members of
his team when they were traveling by chartered airplane to their various
destinations. The players harassed the
flight attendants, threw food, and yelled the length of the airplane to one
another. The airlines had a difficult
time getting flight attendants willing to work when this team was flying.
After much thought, the coach came up with a
solution. From that point on, the team
members were required to wear a suit, tie, and dress shoes when traveling,
instead of the casual attire they had been allowed to wear previously. Their behavior improved greatly. It seemed that when they were dressed like
gentlemen, they behaved like gentlemen.
Flight attendants even began requesting to work on flights chartered by
this team.
The behavior of the team members improved because
they raised their standard of dressing.
The simple fact is that most of us behave better when we are wearing our
Sunday best than when we are wearing our grubby clothing. The same is true with how modest our clothing
is. Immodest clothing - clothing that is
too short or too tight or that draws inappropriate attention to our bodies - leads
us to think and act immodestly as well.
The clothing we wear affects other people around us. Immodest clothing may encourage others to pay
too much attention to our bodies. It may
also lead them to believe untrue things about our standards and our behavior.
The styles that are most fashionable are not
usually modest. Some of the styles can
be modified to make them modest - such as lengthening a skirt or wearing a
jacket over a skimpy top. Other times
the styles cannot be made modest and must be abandoned. We want to dress in such a way that we bring
out the best in ourselves and in the people around us.
Satan appeals to natural desires to lure us into
immorality. The physical attraction
between males and females is natural and normal. Heavenly Father gave those feelings to us
with the understanding that we are to keep them under control until the
appropriate time and circumstances.
Church leaders counsel our youth to delay dating until at least age
sixteen and then to date in groups; they counsel us to remember that some
physical expressions of affection may be appropriate in dating situations but
should not be indulged in casually or with just anyone.
Other
expressions of affection are only appropriate with our spouse after marriage. These expressions include sexual intercourse
and any actions that lead to it, such as intense kissing, touching any part of
another person's body under their clothing, or touching another person's
"private parts" on top of or underneath their clothing. A good rule of thumb is that any thoughts or
actions that increase your interest in or desire for another person's body are
inappropriate and sinful outside of the marriage relationship.
In today's world, we are often led to believe
that important expressions of affection should always be physical, but there
are many ways we can express affection or appreciation without violating the
Lord's standards. Remember that the use
of pornography often leads to immorality.
If you have already participated in inappropriate behavior, you should
talk with your bishop. He can give you counsel
about how to repent.
Keeping the Lord's standards of moral cleanliness
will not necessarily make us popular, but it will lead us toward eternal
happiness, which is much more valuable than the approval of the world.
Our bodies are temples, and the Lord has
commanded us to keep these temples clean (see 1 Corinthians 6:19-20; D&C
133:5); this includes being clean in body, mind, and spirit. I know that it is important to stay morally
clean in order to be truly happy. I
encourage you to keep the Lord's standards and be morally clean and pure. You will never be sorry for staying morally
clean.
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