What Have COVID-19 and Racial Problems Taught Us About Fathers?

            Tomorrow is Father’s Day, an annual celebration for fathers. This year Father’s Day comes three months after everyone was shut up at home to fight COVID-19. Just as the nation began to reopen, a stupid white cop knelt on the neck of black man for nearly nine minutes. The whole thing was caught on video and repulsed the entire nation. Black people began protests about police brutality towards blacks, but the protests were hi-jacked by leftist groups, including Antifa, that started rioting, looting, and killing. So, what have we learned over the past three months about the importance of fathers?


            In an article posted at The Daily Signal, Fred Lucas indicated that this is a significant Father’s Day, maybe more important than most others. Lucas shares information and quotes gathered from an interview with Warren Farrell, a social scientist and co-author of The Boy Crisis: Why Our Boys Are Struggling and What We Can Do About It. “We talk about no child left behind, but we also need to make sure no parent is left behind…. Almost all single mothers are overwhelmed. Many fathers feel left out. Children are hurt. It’s a perfect lose-lose-lose situation.”


            Ferrell indicated that this Father’s Day is extra important “because getting back to normal after the coronavirus pandemic will require the strength of a dad and a family to restore full economic recovery.” He added that we cannot solve the racial divide until we deal with fatherlessness and the “boy crisis.”  “The boy crisis primarily resides where dads do not reside.”


            Farrell described a “Father’s Catch-22” as being a father loving his family enough to leave them all day to provide for them. According to Farrell, the COVID-19 lockdown was a blessing in that it forced fathers to be at home. “Even as COVID has deprived many dads of the ability to provide, it has allowed many children to value dad’s time as much as dad’s dime. It has helped many dads experience at a deeper level that while their career is for now, their children are forever.”


            Farrell recognizes and invests his time writing and speaking about the fact that fatherless homes have a correlation to “higher rates of crime, suicide, dropping out of school, and lower earnings among males.” He calls it “dad deprivation” and says that it harms boys disproportionately. He is not the only one that recognizes the value of fathers in the home.


            Lucas noted that “research from The Heritage Foundation has shown the impact of fatherless homes on poverty as well as how intact marriages help children.” He also indicated that other research shows that “government programs can in some cases make fathers less likely to be active in their children’s lives.”


            The Trump administration has indicated interest in a “council with a goal to ‘Make the American Family Great Again’” according to Farrell. Even though there is not a commitment about the council yet, President Donald Trump made the following Father’s Day proclamation on Friday, as quoted from the Lucas article.

By raising children to be happy, productive, and responsible adults, fathers play a critical role in shaping our society….

Our fathers set an example for us of how to be our best in every aspect of our lives. The lessons they teach us guide us as we strive to care for our families, succeed at school and at work, serve others, and contribute to our communities.

They are integral to raising future generations of Americans who will continue to build an ever-stronger nation. That is why my Administration continues to provide grant funding to organizations across our country that work to strengthen relationships between fathers and their children, foster responsible parenting, and help fathers find and keep gainful employment. Our nation is indebted to the men who have embraced the great blessing and solemn duty of fatherhood.

Every day, they make sacrifices to ensure their children, whether by birth, adoption, or foster care, receive the care and affection they deserve. Today, we express our everlasting gratitude to our fathers and father figures for their love and commitment, and for all they have done to shape our lives.

            In the interview with Lucas, Farrell shared some of his research findings that show the impact of fatherlessness in the lives of boys:

·         Young men in their early 20s commit suicide at almost five times the rate of girls.

·         The biggest single predictor of suicide in such cases is dad deprivation.

·         The five most deadly school shooters of the 21^st century were all dad-deprived boys.

·         Boys drop out of high school at a 42% higher rate than girls.

·         These dropouts experience an unemployment rate of more than 20% in their 20s – more than five times the national average.

·         Men between the ages of 25 and 31 are 66% more likely than women to live with their parents. This may not be caused by dad deprivation because they sometimes live with both parents.

What can we do to solve this problem with boys and young men? Divorced dads should be more involved with their children, and legal systems and society should encourage it. All of us should be careful about saying negative things about the fathers because the boys may see themselves in the same way. Farrell pointed out that “Promoting fatherhood should be a nonpartisan matter” and added that Democrat lawmakers and others have not shown interest in the problem. They seem to be afraid that “talking about the relevance of fatherhood would alienate single mothers, divorced mothers, and lesbian mothers.”

The problem, according to Farrell and in the words of Lucas, is that “increasing fatherlessness” impacts the lives of family members in four major ways: (1) overwhelmed single moms, (2) depressed fathers with neither purpose nor love, (3) children who are more likely to be damaged in over 50 developmental areas, and (4) ‘pockets of fatherlessness becoming pockets of crime.’”

Here are some suggestions from Farrell about how America can overcome the COVID-19-caused economy and help their children at the same time: Fathers can serve America best by being loving fathers to their children. Courts should realize that the poorest communities are usually hurt the worst when fathers must fight to be with their children. All of us must realize that children need both parents to be involved in their lives.

            If America is to overcome the double tragedies caused by COVID-19 and racial unrest, we must recognize that children – particularly boys – need their fathers. It does not matter that the mother is a good parent because she can never make up for the loss of a father. Children deserve to have both a father and a mother to love them and teach them. Both fathers and mothers in the home are necessary to strengthen and unify the nation.