Is Traditional Marriage Essential for the Survival of Our Society?

            The liberty principle for this Freedom Friday is about traditional marriage and how it is essential for freedom in America. Traditional marriage and the nuclear family consisting of a father, a mother, and children are essential for strong communities and nations and the foundation for a strong society. America and other nations are currently undergoing a revolution where well-meaning people want to bring justice and equality into the marriage relationship.

In Obergefell v. Hodges, five unelected justices redefined marriage, the oldest institution in the history of the world. Ryan T. Anderson, a strong defender of traditional marriage, claimed that this decision teaches a false narrative about marriage. He wrote the following in his book titled Truth Overruled – The Future of Marriage and Religious Freedom:

If the law teaches a falsehood about marriage, it will make it harder for people to live out the truth of marriage. Marital norms make no sense, as a matter of principle, if what makes a marriage is merely intense emotional feeling, an idea captured in the bumper-sticker slogan “Love makes a family.” There is no reason that mere consenting adult love as to be permanent or limited to two persons, much less sexually exclusive. And so, as people internalize this new vision of marriage, marriage will be less and less a stabilizing force.

But if fewer people live out the norms of marriage, then fewer people will reap the benefits of the institution of marriage – not only spouses, but also children. Preserving the man-woman definition of marriage is the only way to preserve the benefits of marriage and avoid the enormous societal risks accompanying a genderless marriage regime. How can the law teach that fathers are essential, for instance, when it has officially made them optional?

The essence of marriage as a male-female union, however, has become an unwelcome truth. Indeed, a serious attempt is well under way to define opposition to same-sex marriage as nothing more than irrational bigotry. If that attempt succeeds, it will pose the most serious threat to the rights of conscience and religious freedom in American history (2015, p. 2).

            According to Anderson, defenders of traditional marriage are not bigots and should be respected for and supported in their efforts. The same people who are defending marriage are also standing up for freedom of religion and freedom of conscience – both of which are being attacked by big business, big media, and big government. In the fight to bring respect for same-sex marriage, opponents of traditional (Biblical) marriage are pressuring churches to stop teaching that homosexuality is a sin.

            Anderson argued that defenders of marriage should take a lesson from the pro-life community. When the right to abortion was created in January 1973 by Roe v. Wade, the pro-life community did not roll over and accept it. They kept fighting for the lives of unborn children, and their efforts brought the overturning of Roe in June 2022. The Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health Organization decision did not make abortion legal or illegal, but it sent the debate back to the states for resolution. Even though abortion and same-sex marriage are different in nature, Anderson believes there are three lessons that can be learned from the pro-life movement.

1. We must call the court’s ruling in Obergefell v. Hodges what it is: judicial activism.

Just as the pro-life movement successfully rejected Roe v. Wade and exposed its lies about unborn life and about the U.S. Constitution, we must make it clear to our fellow citizens that Obergefell v. Hodges does not tell the truth about marriage or about our Constitution.

2. We must protect our freedom to speak and live according to the truth.

The pro-life movement accomplished this on at least three fronts. First, it ensured that pro-life doctors and nurses and pharmacists and hospitals would never have to perform abortions or dispense abortion-causing drugs. Second, it won the battle – through the Hyde Amendment – to prevent taxpayer money from paying for abortions. And third, it made sure that pro-lifers and pro-life organizations could not be discriminated against by the government. Pro-marriage forces need to do the same: Ensure that we have freedom from government coercion to lead our lives, rear our children, and operate our business and our charities in accord with our beliefs – the truth – about marriage. Likewise, we must ensure that the government does not discriminate against citizens or organizations because of their belief that marriage is the union of husband and wife.

3. We have to bear witness to the truth in a winsome and compelling way.

The pro-life movement accomplished this on different levels. Specialists in science, law, philosophy, and theology laid the foundation of the pro-life case with research and writing in their disciplines, while advocacy groups tirelessly appealed to the hearts of the American people. Pro-lifers did much more than preach, launching a multitude of initiatives to help mothers in crisis pregnancies make the right choice.

            Like the pro-lifers, Anderson encouraged proponents for traditional marriage to “make the case for the truth about marriage.” To retain the truth about marriage, we must share it with our neighbors and other families and communities. We can “find the social science on marriage and parenting,” and we can amplify the “voices of the victims of the sexual revolution.” By doing so, we can become more effective in defending traditional marriage and religious freedom.

Defend Traditional Marriage

                The liberty principle for this Freedom Friday is the simple fact that we can defend traditional marriage by being enthusiastic and committed to it.  We must show by our own lives and experiences that traditional marriage is good and something we want.  Even though none of us will actually have the “ideal marriage,” we must make our own marriages as close to the ideal as possible.

                Linda and Richard Eyre posted an interesting article about this subject entitled “What defenders of traditional marriage may be forgetting.”  A summary of their article is “The largest threat to our society and to our economy is not the way people define marriage, but how enthusiastically and committedly they participate in it.” 

                Here is a quote that I found very interesting.  “… Commitment is the start of a relationship that lasts, not the culmination of it.  And the commitment of marriage is what lends security both to husband and wife and to the children who join them.

                “If defenders of marriage are consumed and preoccupied in fighting against same-sex marriage, they are like a sports team that tries to shut down the opposing team but does not score any points for itself.  People vigorously fighting same-sex marriage but doing little or nothing to advocate for promote traditional marriage are like a defense with no offense.

                “The best way to make a difference is to celebrate commitment – the commitment of marriage.

                “The debate over same-sex marriage will go on, just as the abortion debate goes on.  A Supreme Court ruling does not put an end to either issue.  Society may still be divided over same-sex marriage in 50 years, just as we are still divided now on the abortion issue 50 years after Roe vs. Wade.

                “We personally believe the institution of marriage was instituted by God and that he defined it and continues to define it as a potentially eternal union between one man and one woman.

                “But whatever our personal position, each of us should ask the question of what we should be most concerned about – the emergence of same-sex marriage or the disappearance of traditional marriage.”

                President Henry B. Eyring of the First Presidency of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints gave a 15-minute talk – witness or testimony – of traditional marriage at a conference convened by Cardinal Gerhard Muller, a prefect at the Vatican - Humanum:  An International Interreligious Colloquium on the Complementarity of Man and Woman.  He bore person witness of “the power of the union of a man and a woman in marriage to produce happiness for each other and for their family.”  

                President Eyring explained the Latter-day Saint belief of eternal marriage – a marriage ordinance that blesses the couple and their posterity through time and throughout eternity.  “We were promised that after this life, we could continue to enjoy whatever loving family sociality we could create in life.”  He emotionally shared how his own marriage has brought great fulfillment.  “I have become a better person as I have loved and lived with her…. We have been complementary beyond anything I could have imagined.  Her capacity to nurture others grew in me as we became one.  My capacity to plan, direct and lead in our family grew in her as we became united in marriage.  I realize now that we grew together into one – slowly lifting and shaping each other, year by year.  As we absorbed strength from each other, it did not diminish our personal gifts. 

                “Our differences combined as if they were designed to create a better whole.  Rather than dividing us, our differences bound us together.  Above all, our unique abilities allowed us to become partners with God in creating human life.  The happiness that came from our becoming one built faith in our children and grandchildren that marriage could be a continuing source of satisfaction for them and their families.”

                After reading from the Proclamation on the Family, President Eyring said, “Those are things people must do for us to have a renaissance of happy marriages and productive families.”  He encouraged couples to be persistent in strengthening their marriages because future generations will build upon whatever foundation is placed.  “Such a renaissance will require people to try for the ideal – and to keep trying even when the happy result is slow to come and when loud voices mock the effort.” 

                We can defend traditional marriage by following the principles in the Proclamation on the Family and by trying to make our own marriage as close to the ideal as possible.  We must be enthusiastically committed to traditional marriage and let our example show for others to follow, particularly our own children and grandchildren.

Modern Black Robed Regiment

                I wrote about the original Black Robed Regiment in September 2011.  The British blamed the Black Robed Regiment for the Revolutionary War, and modern historians agree.  The British named the patriotic group of clergy for the black robes they wore while performing their church duties.  The pastors were courageous in their leadership in the cause of liberty for the American patriots.

                According to historian David Barton, the rights listed in the Declaration of Independence came from the sermons given by the clergy for the previous two decades.  The clergy were credited by the British, the Founding Fathers, and modern historians for inspiring and supporting the fight for independence.

                On August 28, 2010, Glenn Beck held his Restoring Honor event at the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, D.C.  That event closed with Beck introducing a “group of 240 religious leaders from among the `Black Robed Regiment’ that includes clergy of various denominations, ranging from evangelical pastors to Roman Catholic priests to Jewish rabbis to Muslim imams, among others….”

                Beck recently made an announcement about the modern Black Robed Regiment “ready to stand against the government.”  His announcement included an interview with David Barton who explained the role of the pastors – “black pastors, white pastors, Catholic and Protestant” -- in the American Revolution.  Barton then told the following story about George Whitfield, a preacher who was “influential in both American politics and the military.” 

                “When we had the Stamp Act that really kind of started the whole process of moving toward the Revolution, when it came time to protest the Stamp Act in London, America sent two people to London to protest the Stamp Act.  One was Ben Franklin, the other was George Whitfield.  So there’s a guy very involved in politics.  Then when it comes times – Whitfield is one of the first to tell the Americans, if you want to preserve your freedoms, you’ll have to separate and become independent.  Whitfield is the guy credited with starting the American military, the first military flag, and the first military motto.  So when he died in 1770, which was the end of the Great Awakening, at his death, he was buried at a church in Newbury Port, Massachusetts.  When George Washington sent the first expedition out to start the American Revolution, it was to Quebec in 1775.  That expedition going out of Massachusetts stopped at the church at Newbury Port, where Whitfield was buried.  They went inside.  They had a sermon.  After the sermon, they lifted the top [of] the sepulcher, and the soldiers all reached in and cut off a piece of Whitfield’s robe to take with them into battle.  Because he’s the father of the military.  Now, how many preachers today would be accused of being the father of the military or are arguing economic policy in front of parliament or starting the military.  That’s the Black Robe Regiment back then.”

                Barton says “the Black Robed Regiment has grown to 40,000 preachers.  These are men with character and backbone, who are standing up for Biblical principles and freedom of conscience.  `It’s not only the time, but we’re now seeing people respond,’ David said.  `We’re seeing pastors respond in a way we haven’t seen.  We have seen in the last few days, 40,000 pastors sign a petition that says, I will go to jail before I follow what the Supreme Court says if they get marriage wrong.  They can do what they want to.  40,000 pastors, including one pastor with a 35,000-member church.  And those are usually the guys that don’t have the backbone, is the guys with the megachurches.  We will not compromise on this.  We will go to jail on this.  But we’re standing for the biblical definition of marriage.”

                Even though its leaders do not wear black robes, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has taken a stand for traditional marriage.  In January 2014 after a federal judge struck down Utah’s ban on same-sex marriage, The First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles issued the following statement.  

                “… Changes in the civil law do not, indeed cannot, change the moral law that God has established.  God expects us to uphold and keep His commandments regardless of divergent opinions or trends in society.  His law of chastity is clear:  sexual relations are proper only between a man and a woman who are legally and lawfully wedded as husband and wife….

                “Just as those who promote same-sex marriage are entitled to civility, the same is true for those who oppose it.  The Church insists on its leaders’ and members’ constitutionally protected right to express and advocate religious convictions on marriage, family, and morality free from retaliation or retribution.  The Church is also entitled to maintain its standard of moral conduct and good standing for members.

                “Consistent with our fundamental beliefs, Church officers will not employ their ecclesiastical authority to perform marriages between two people of the same sex, and the Church does not permit its meetinghouses or other properties to be used for ceremonies, receptions, or other activities associated with same-sex marriages.  Nevertheless, all visitors are welcome to our chapels and premises so long as they respect our standards of conduct while there….” 

                In April 2015 the Church joined a number of other religions – such as the Southern Baptist Convention, the Lutheran Church – Missouri Synod, the National Association of Evangelicals, the Free Methodist Church – USA, and the International Pentecostal Holiness Church – in a “friend of the court” brief, “urging the court to uphold a traditional definition of marriage.”  The Supreme Court heard oral arguments on April 28.  

                The amicus filing stated, “Notwithstanding our theological differences, we are united in declaring that the traditional institution of marriage is indispensable to the welfare of the American family and society.  We are also united in our belief that a decision requiring the States to license or recognize same-sex marriage would generate church-state conflicts that will imperil vital religious liberties.  This brief is submitted out of our firm judgment that the Constitution does not require States to take that fateful step.”

                LDS teachings listed in the filing include the following relevant principles:  (1) “marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God,” (2) “the traditional family is the foundation of society,” and (3) “marriage and family supply the crucial relationships through which parents and children acquire private and public virtue.”

                “Out of support for these fundamental beliefs, the Church appears in this case to defend the traditional, husband-wife definition of marriage.”

                Even though The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints backed a recent Utah bill that guarded against discrimination in housing and employment for LGBT people, it also back a bill that allows county clerks to opt-out of performing same sex marriage but someone in the office must do it.

                LDS Church spokesman Eric Hawkins wrote in a statement to FOX 13:  “The Church’s deep belief and commitment to marriage between a man and a woman is well known.  While we have been outspoken proponents in favor of protections for LGBT people in such areas as housing and employment, we believe that a redefinition of marriage to include same-sex couples has profoundly troubling implications for society in the long term.  We have therefore joined with many other diverse faiths representing tens of millions of Americans in expressing our views to the Supreme Court.”

                The Black Robed Regiment has taken a stand to support traditional marriage.  Are you willing to take the same stand?  Will you go to jail rather than support same-sex marriage?

Defend Traditional Marriage

                Families, communities, and nations are strengthened when we defend traditional marriage.  The Catholic Church invited religious leaders and scholars representing 14 faith traditions from 23 countries to assemble at the Vatican on November 17-19, 2014.  This historic gathering was called to discuss traditional marriage and how men and women complement each other in marriage.

                President Henry B. Eyring of the First Presidency of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints addressed the assembly on November 18.  “Most remarkable to me has been the fulfillment of the hope I felt the day I met my wife.  I have become a better person as I have loved and lived with her.  We have been complementary beyond anything I could have imagined.  Her capacity to nurture others grew in me as we became one.  My capacity to plan, direct, and lead in our family grew in her as we became united in marriage.  I realize now that we grew together into one – slowly lifting and shaping each other, year by year.  As we absorbed strength from each other, it did not diminish our personal gifts.

                “Our differences combined as if they were designed to create a better whole.  Rather than dividing us, our differences bound us together.  Above all, our unique abilities allowed us to become partners with God in creating human life.  The happiness that came from our becoming one built faith in our children and grandchildren that marriage could be a continuing source of satisfaction for them and their families.

                “You have seen enough unhappiness in marriages and families to ask why some marriages produce happiness while others create unhappiness.  Many factors make a difference, but one stands out to me.

                “Where there is selfishness, natural differences of men and women often divide.  Where there is unselfishness, differences become complementary and provide opportunities to help and build each other.  Spouses and family members can lift each other and ascend together if they care more about the interests of the other than their own interests.

                “If unselfishness is the key to complementary marriage between a man and a woman, we know what we must do to help create a renaissance of successful marriages and family life.

                “We must find ways to lead people to a faith that they can replace their natural self-interest with deep and lasting feelings of charity and benevolence.  With that change, and only then, will people be able to make the hourly unselfish sacrifices necessary for a happy marriage and family life – and to do it with a smile.

                “The change that is needed is in people’s hearts more than in their minds.  The most persuasive logic will not be enough unless it helps soften hearts.  For instance, it is important for men and women to be faithful to a spouse and a family.  But in the heat of temptation to betray their trust, only powerful feelings of love and loyalty will be enough.”

                President Eyring then proceeded to read and explain the proclamation made to the world in September 1995 by the First Presidency and Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  That proclamation is entitled “The Family:  A Proclamation to the World.”  

                Thousands, if not millions, of marriages and families have been strengthened through following the guidelines of this proclamation.  As marriages and families are strengthened, they tend to strengthen their communities and nations.