"Charity Never Faileth"

            “Charity never faileth” is the motto of the Relief Society, the women’s group in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and one of the oldest and largest women’s organizations in the world. Charity is an attribute of Jesus Christ and necessary in order for us to return to the presence of our Heavenly Father.

            Thomas S. Monson, prophet, seer, revelator, and president of the Church, spoke on the topic of “Charity Never Faileth” at the Relief Society Broadcast in October 2010. He began his talk by sharing the following story. 

A young couple, Lisa and John, moved into a new neighborhood. One morning while they were eating breakfast, Lisa looked out the window and watched her next-door neighbor hanging out her wash.

“That laundry’s not clean!” Lisa exclaimed. “Our neighbor doesn’t know how to get clothes clean!”

John looked on but remained silent.

Every time her neighbor would hang her wash to dry, Lisa would make the same comments.

A few weeks later Lisa was surprised to glance out her window and see a nice, clean wash hanging in her neighbor’s yard. She said to her husband, “Look, John – she’s finally learned how to wash correctly! I wonder how she did it.”

John replied, “Well, dear, I have the answer for you. You’ll be interested to know that I got up early this morning and washed our windows!”

            President Monson then  asked, “Are we looking through a window which needs cleaning? Are we making judgments when we don’t have all the facts? What do we see when we look at others? What judgments do we make about them?” He suggested that “Why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?” could be compared with “Why beholdest thou what you think is dirty laundry at your neighbor’s house but considerest not the soiled window in our own house?” He continued.

None of us is perfect. I know of no one who would profess to be so. And yet for some reason, despite our own imperfections, we have a tendency to point out those of others. We make judgments concerning their actions or inactions.

There is really no way we can know the heart, the intentions, or the circumstances of someone who might say or do something we find reason to criticize. Thus the commandment: “Judge not.” …

I have always loved your Relief Society motto: “Charity never faileth.” [1 Corinthians 13:8] What is charity? The prophet Mormon teaches us that “charity is the pure love of Christ.” [Moroni 7:47] In his farewell message to the Lamanites, Moroni declared, “Except ye have charity ye can in nowise be saved in the kingdom of God.” [Moroni 10:21]

I consider charity – or “the pure love of Christ” – to be the opposite of criticism and judging. In speaking of charity, I do not at this moment have in mind the relief of the suffering through the giving of our substance. That, of course, is necessary and proper. Tonight, however, I have in mind the charity that manifests itself when we are tolerant of others and lenient of others and lenient toward their actions, the kind of charity that forgives, the kind of charity that is patient.

I have in mind the charity that impels us to be sympathetic, compassionate, and merciful, not only in times of sickness and affliction and distress but also in times of weakness or error on the part of others.

There is a serious need for the charity that gives attention to those who are unnoticed, hope to those who are discouraged, aid to those who are afflicted. True charity is love in action. The need for charity is everywhere.

            According to President Monson, we must have mercy, tolerance, sympathy, and compassion in order to have charity. For a recent religion class I chose to develop the Christlike attribute of tolerance. One of the “weekly opportunities” I did in my becoming project was to pray for a woman in my congregation that sorts of grates on my nerves. I decided that I would pray for this sister and her family every day. As my project continued, I became concerned for her and how she was dealing with difficult children and her husband’s occupation. I had softer, more tender thoughts about her. I do not know if my prayers helped her, but they helped me develop more tolerance for her. It was as though someone had “washed” my “windows.”

            In a recent Time Out for Women (TOFW) in Anchorage, Alaska, Anthony Sweat said that the opposite of charity is pride, selfishness, and cares of the world. He described charity as the “Fatherly love of God for His children and His children for Him.” Love of God fills us with joy. Love of God plus Love for God equals Love like God or Charity. Charity changes our natures.

            Charity is not easy to develop because it includes all the other Christlike attributes. We cannot develop charity until we have humility, meekness, patience, tolerance, etc. “Charity never faileth” because anyone who has charity is like Jesus Christ.

Charity

                Charity is the greatest of all virtues because it is the pure love of Jesus Christ.  We can understand charity better by looking at the life of Christ because His life reflects His pure love for all mankind.  He has commanded us to love one another as He loves us.  We can know if we have pure love by showing genuine concern and compassion for all mankind.

                An ancient American prophet by the name of Moroni wrote, “Wherefore, cleave unto charity, which is the greatest of all, for all things must fail – but charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever” (Book of Mormon – Another Testament of Jesus Christ, Moroni 7:46-37).

                Jesus Christ was a perfect man with a perfect love.  He showed us by His example that the spiritual and physical needs of other people are as important as our own.  He gave His life for us that we might have the opportunity to return to His presence.  Prior to His death, He said, “This is my commandment, that ye love one another as I have loved you.  Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:12-13).

                If we are to have true charity, we must be willing to give to the sick, afflicted, and poor.  One of the Savior’s parables was about the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:30-37).  This parable teaches us that we are to help those in need regardless of whether they are family or friend.  The parable tells the story of man (probably a Jew) traveling to another city.  He was attacked by bandits during his travel.  The bandits beat him and then stole his clothes and money before leaving him for dead.  A Jewish priest came along, saw the injured man, and passed by him.  Then a Jewish temple attendant saw him, looked closely at him, and then went past him.  A Samaritan – one person of a group hated by the Jews – came along.  He saw the injured man and felt deep compassion.  He bandaged the man’s wounds and then put him on his donkey.  He took the man to an inn where he continued to care for him.  The next morning he paid the innkeeper to take care of the man until he recovered from his injuries.

                Jesus taught that we are to give food to the hungry, clothes to the poor, and shelter to those in need.  He taught us to visit the sick and those who are in prison and said if we are doing these things it is as though we were doing them to Him.  If we do these things, we are promised an inheritance in the celestial kingdom.

                Conversely, Jesus also taught that if we turn away those who are sick and in prison or in need of food, clothes or shelter, it is as though we turn away the Savior (see Mathew 25:34-36).  We are not responsible to decide whether or not they are “worthy” of our help (see Book of Mormon, Mosiah 4:16-24).  We should take care of the needs of our own family first; then we should help all who need our help.  We are required to help everyone and let God sort out the details just as Heavenly Father send rain upon the just and on the unjust alike (Matt. 5:44-45).

                According to the Apostle Paul, we do not exhibit charity simply by giving to those in need; we do not have charity unless we feel compassion for the people we are helping (see 1 Corinthians 13:3).       Paul taught that we have charity if we have special feelings for all people.  When we have charity, we are patient, kind, not boastful or proud, not haughty, selfish or rude.  When we have charity, we do not remember or rejoice in the evil done by others.  When we have charity, we do not do good things simply for our own advantage.  When we have charity, we feel joy for those who live by the truth.  When we have charity, we are loyal; we believe the best about other people and defend them.  These good feelings stay with us when we have true charity (see 1 Corinthians 13:4-8).

                We can become more charitable by practicing four principles:  (1) We can study the life of the Savior and keep His commandments; (2) We can pray for charity and to have uncharitable feelings taken away; (3) We can learn to love ourselves by learning to respect and trust ourselves; (4) We can love other people as we love ourselves by being patient with them and not thinking we are better than they are.

                The book of Enos in the Book of Mormon is about a young man who had a great desire to know if God had forgiven his sins.  “My soul hungered; and I kneeled down before my Maker, and I cried unto him in mighty prayer and supplication for mine own soul; and all the day long did I cry unto him; yea, and when the night came I did still raise my voice high that it reached the heavens.  And there came a voice unto me saying:  Enos, they sins are forgiven thee, and thou shalt be blessed” (Enos 1:4-5).

                The Lord explained to Enos that He had forgiven his sins because Enos had so much faith in Jesus Christ.  When Enos understood that he was spiritually okay, he began to feel concern for the welfare of his friends and relative.  He prayed for them with all his heart, and the Lord told him that they would be blessed according to their faithfulness in keeping His commandments (Enos 1:7-9).

                Enos’ ability to love continued to increase, and he prayed for his enemies.  The Lord granted his desires, and Enos spent the rest of his life trying to have the souls of the Nephites and the Lamanites.  Enos willingly worked for all his remaining years helping others because he was so grateful for the Lord’s love and forgiveness (Enos 1:11-23).

 

                Enos had developed true charity.  We too can become truly charitable; in fact, we have been commanded to do so in order to inherit a place in the Father’s kingdom.

Visiting Teaching

                    Families grow stronger as the adult female members of the family participate in the visiting teaching program of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  Being a visiting teacher strengthens a woman as she forgets her own troubles and ministers to other women.  Receiving visiting teachers strengthens a woman as she receives watch care and ministering from other women.  The two parts of the visiting teaching program support and strengthen homes and families.

In 1843, Church members in Nauvoo, Illinois, were divided into four wards.  In July of that year Relief Society leaders appointed four sisters in each ward to serve as a visiting committee.  The responsibilities of the committees were to assess the needs of their sisters and to collect donations.  The donations were used by the Relief Society to provide for the needy.

                    Visiting teachers no longer collect donations when we visit our sisters, but we still have the same responsibility to assess the needs of the sisters - spiritual and physical - and to work to meet those needs.  Eliza R. Snow (1804-87) who served as our second Relief Society general president explained:  "A teacher … should surely have so much of the Spirit of the Lord, as she enters a house to know what spirit she meets in there….  Plead before God and the Holy Ghost to get [the Spirit] so that you will be able to meet that spirit that prevails in that house … and you may feel to talk words of peace and comfort, and if you find a sister feeling cold, take her to your heart as you would a child to your bosom and warm [her] up."

                    President Henry B. Eyring, First Counselor in the First Presidency, taught: "Charity [means] far more than a feeling of benevolence. Charity is born of faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and is an effect of His Atonement."  An important way for us to exercise our faith in the Savior is to be charity in action.

                    Visiting teachers provide watchcare by contacting each sister, sharing a gospel message, and seeking to know the needs of the sister and her family.  Julie B. Beck, Relief Society general president, explained:  "Visiting teaching becomes the Lord's work when our focus is on people rather than percentages.  In reality, visiting teaching is never finished.  It is more a way of life than a task.  Faithfully serving as a visiting teacher is evidence of our discipleship."

                    We learn how to best minister to and meet the needs of each other and our families as we provide consistent and prayerful watchcare.  This ministering can take many forms.  President Thomas S. Monson taught, "Often small acts of service are all that is required to lift and bless another:  a question concerning a person's family, quick words of encouragement, a sincere compliment, a small note of thanks, a brief telephone call.  If we are observant and aware, and if we act on the promptings which come to us, we can accomplish much good….  Countless are the acts of service provided by the vast army of Relief Society visiting teachers."

                    I know that the visiting teaching program was inspired by God for the benefit of all his daughters.  I always enjoy going into the homes of my sisters to leave a message and get to know them better; and I also enjoy having sisters come into my home to teach me.  I always try to make the visits as convenient as possible for my own teachers.  This program is a wonderful blessing for all the daughters of God and their families!