Individuals can strengthen their
family as well as their community and nation by getting married – preferably before
the birth of any children. When I speak of marriage, I mean a union between one
man and one woman. In 1995 the First Presidency and the Quorum of Twelve Apostles
of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints published a document titled “The Family: A Proclamation to the World.” The first paragraph of the document defined
“marriage [as being] between a man and a woman” and declared such a marriage to
be “ordained of God.”
According to Jim Daly, such a
marriage brings myriad benefits to the spouses, to their children, and to
society. (See his book titled “Marriage Done Right: One Man, One Woman.”) In an
article published by The Daily Signal, Timothy Goeglein quoted the statement
from Daly, who is the president of Focus on the Family.
Quoting a recent essay by W. Bradford Wilcox, Goeglein said that one of the key benefits from marriage is
happiness. He also noted, “It’s perhaps no coincidence that some of the most
dissatisfied voices in our toxic public discourse come from those who are not
married.”
Wilcox wrote that in 1970, there were 77
marriages per 100 women. Forty-five years later, that number had decreased to
32 marriages per hundred, and it has continued to decrease to the point where,
according to the 2022 American Family Survey, the share of American men and
women who are currently married is only 45%.
The decreasing marriage rate has led to a
spike in the number of people living alone – more than 37 million adults as of
2021. While not all adults living alone are lonely, many are, and those
individuals are more likely to lack significant social connections, which can
be deadly…..
But the problem goes beyond just the
individual. It affects our society as well. Many of our current cultural
divides can be traced to social isolation and the lack of connections
individuals have with a wide swath of people. Thus, loneliness, and the
bitterness it ferments, has not occurred in a vacuum.
Nevertheless, despite evidence that
documents how marriage provides many of the social connections needed to not
just survive, but to thrive in life, our culture continues to send messages
that women do not need a husband to be happy; that men should focus on their
careers instead of family; and “the kids will be all right” even when they lack
a mother or a father.
Goeglein again looked at Wilcox’s
essay in which Wilcox looks at research from the American Community Survey on
the happiness of married vs. single women – and declared the contrast to be “stark.”
“Married mothers between the ages of 18 and 55 have mean household income of $133,000,
compared with $79,000 for those in the same age range that re single and
childless.” However, finances do not paint the whole picture of contentment and
happiness.
In the American Family Survey, 33% of
those same married mothers reported they were “completely satisfied” with their
lives. In contrast, only 15% of single and childless women felt the same way.
In addition, about 60% of those single and
childless women were more likely to report feelings of loneliness compared with
married mothers. That suggests that the bonds created through family and
friends are perhaps the most important factor in life satisfaction. Given the
trend that married women tend to be deeply concerned about cultural issues that
affect their families, and as a result often lean more conservative in their
worldview, it logically follows that the happiest women are conservative women.
Conservatives also have ties to
organizations, such as churches, that provide connections with others. The
survey reports a 15-percentage point gap between conservative women saying they
are completely satisfied with their lives, compared with liberal women (31% vs.
16%).
Goeglein continued by saying that it
was not just the women because another study demonstrated “the positive changes
men experience once they become fathers, such as becoming less self-absorbed
and more empathetic to others.” He then declared that “The key to a happy life
is a connected life – and marriage and families are a common denominator in making
those connections.”
The surveys showed that married
women and married men are happier and more satisfied with their lives than are
their single counterparts. Happy couples lead to happy and strong families, and
happy and strong families strengthen their communities and nations.
