Marriages are stronger when spouses live their religion and attend church meetings regularly, and strong marriages create a firm foundation for strong families, which in turn strengthen communities, states, and nations. In his article published at The Daily Signal, Timothy Goeglein reported on a survey recently completed by Focus on the Family with more than 3,800 participants. The survey questioned “how faith impacts personal decisions about marriage and recorded married respondents’ self-assessments of their unions.”
The
good news is that 74% of all married couples described their marriages as “healthy.”
But even more encouraging is that convictional Christians – those who actively
live out and practice their faith – scored higher on all 32 aspects of marriage
that speak to matrimonial health – whether it be taking responsibility for
mistakes, having compassion toward each other, trust, or financial management.
The
difference between convictional Christian marriages and non-Christian marriages
comes into focus, so to speak, when one digs deeper into the research findings.
The study found that 25% of non-Christians surveyed said their marriages were
in crisis, while only 13% of convictional Christians said so. And among those
who profess faith, but not as strongly as convictional Christians, 22% of
nominal Christians and 17% of born-again Christians said their marriages were
in crisis.
Thus,
when it comes to marriage, faith really does matter.
But
don’t just take Focus on the Family’s word on it. Other researchers have found
the same thing. A Harvard School of Public Health study found that couples who
regularly attend church services are about 30%-50% less likely to divorce.
This
statistic also holds true across racial groups. Research done by Kenneth
Pargament and Annette Mahoney of Bowling Green University’s Spirituality and
Psychology Research Team found that marriages are stronger and happier when
husbands and wives understand there is a deeper spiritual significance to
marriage beyond feelings or economic security.
Unfortunately,
over the past several decades, the understanding of marriage as a sacred bond
between a man and a woman has been lost as faith has diminished and our society
becomes more about personal happiness and “self-fulfillment.” [Is it] any
wonder why divorce has become so prevalent in our culture, as faith – the glue
that keeps couples together – loses influence in our society?
Or
as the late esteemed social scientist James Q. Wilson put it, “Marriage was
once a sacrament, then it became a contract, and now it is an arrangement. Once
religion provided the sacrament, then the law enforced the contract, and now
personal preferences define the arrangement.
And
sadly, because of these factors, many young people, as the Focus on the Family
study finds, are less interested in getting married, with only 56% of single,
non-married respondents saying they want to be married someday.
Thus,
the renewal of faith in our culture is essential to solving the breakdown of
marriage and the family – the two bedrock institutions that affect both present
and future generations either positively or negatively. It is this same renewal
of faith that will make marriage an institution to be desired, rather than one
that has come with the negative emotional baggage of separation and divorce for
so many young people.
And
those of us in healthy marriages need to come alongside those who are
struggling to offer support and encouragement. We also need to model what a
biblical marriage looks like, through our words and actions, so people will be
drawn to what we have, rather than be repelled by what they see when marriages
take a wrong turn and head down the wrong road to dissolution….
To
restore the commitment of marriage and the family and begin to reverse the
tragic trends of the past 60-plus years, our efforts must start with the
renewal of faith and the restoration of the family. By doing so, we will reap
benefits beyond just stable families…
As Goeglein
stated, stable families bring about stability in other areas by successfully
addressing other issues, such as “unwed pregnancy, drug addiction, income
inequality, and government dependence – that plague our society.” A healthy
society benefits everyone, both married and single. Thus, strong marriages and
families strengthen communities, states, and nations.
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